no title, just words

Depression has got me channeling my emo side. ha..

Did you go through an emo stage? I don’t think I ever outgrew mine actually. Im still quite weird and dark when no one is looking. Ill wear a certain necklace, shirt, etc; underneath so no one knows its there but me. It makes me feel like a super hero in their everyday disguise. But really Clark Kent, you’re not fooling anyone with those fake glasses. Do they even have lenses?… mine do. Ya jerk.

Honestly, my whole blog and instagram makes me feel like a super hero in disguise. People at work don’t know what I do outside of here.  Or if one or two know, they don’t know how to find me.  I like it that way.  Its like my little secret. I like it that way. Is it weird that i’m somewhat embarrassed by something that bring me so much joy? My parents know I blog and cook and am working on a book and such. But I’ve never told them the name of it. This is like my sanctuary. I don’t want the real world to find me.

Oh, FullSizeRender (24)depression. You’re such a funny little monster. One bad day turns into a never ending repetition that lasts for weeks.. even months.  Sometimes longer. I have taken anxiety meds since I was 14.  Only to be followed by anti-depressants a few years later. Don’t get me wrong. They have saved my life. Many times over. With as much money as I have spent on treatments over the years, I probably could have paid for a brain transplant by now. That would be great actually… Or maybe just half a brain transplant. I’d like to keep the part that makes me good at cooking. That part can stay.

I hope my kickstarter funds. I want to spend my days making new recipes. I want to live in my happy place. One step at at time though, right? Im working on a cookbook. Did you know that? I haven’t told a lot of people. I think I was scared that I would give up half way through. But its actually coming along quite nicely. I will finally get to birth a child. A child made of ink and paper. It’s going to be glorious.

I apologize, Clark Kent. You’re actually a pretty swell guy.

9 thoughts on “no title, just words

  1. Abcynth says:

    I love your little corner of the internet. Thank you for being so open and sharing all the good and the bad. It helps to know that there’s someone out here going through some of the same stuff.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. themovement1316 says:

    I love coming to your blog, you’re always so open and honest. I’m doing the same as you. My blog is something no friends or relatives no about. This is our place to say what we want without being judged. And I love it. Best of luck with your book and I would love to get to know you more so I will continue loving your blog x

    Liked by 1 person

    • My goodness you know how to make a girl smile. Yes! This is our space. It’s def where I come when I want to escape for a while. It makes me feel wonderful that you enjoy my blog, half the time I feel like wordpress lies to me about how many views I have had haha Thanks for sticking around ❤


      • themovement1316 says:

        Aww, I love that you both liked the comment and replied. I definitely think bloggers such have a connection with one another. My blog doesn’t tend to get many views but I try not to focus on statistics. The internet is like our own little junk draw to hide what we want to hide the the real world

        Liked by 1 person

      • themovement1316 says:

        I don’t know if this would be of any interest to you or not but I’ve emailed you with details about it anyway (as I just realised you have a contact page) regarding writing a guest post


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